Yol · 12 Stations · 12 days · Human Nature › Influence
Handle Difficult People
Someone who stays steady around difficult people: diagnoses before reacting, protects themselves, talks when talking can work, and leaves or pushes back when it cannot.
Twelve Stations, one a day, for the boss, colleague, client or relative who wears you down. You learn to tell a bad moment from a lasting pattern, when distance is the best move, how to make a hard conversation safe, how to calm an angry person, when to push back, and how not to become the next difficult person. The road ends with a one-page plan used for real.
The road, station by station
01The moment or the person?
~5 minfrom The Asshole Survival Guide
Today’s Station — start →
02The best move may be out
lockedfrom The Asshole Survival Guide
03Change how you see it
lockedfrom The Asshole Survival Guide
04Make it safe first
lockedfrom Crucial Conversations
05Facts first, then your story
lockedfrom Crucial Conversations
06Build your case before you need it
lockedfrom The Asshole Survival Guide
Milestone
Diagnosis and a record
For one difficult person in your life, two things are written down: whether it is a passing moment or a lasting pattern and what it costs you, and a dated record of incidents you have started keeping.
07Observation, feeling, need, request
lockedfrom Nonviolent Communication
08Three conversations at once
lockedfrom Difficult Conversations
09Label the heat
lockedfrom Never Split the Difference
10When to push back
lockedfrom The Asshole Survival Guide
11Don't catch it
lockedfrom The Asshole Survival Guide
12Your plan for one difficult person
lockedfrom The Asshole Survival Guide
Milestone
Destination: your plan for one difficult person
Your one-page plan is written: diagnosis, distance, the conversation (safe, facts first, needs, labelling), the record, and your exit or push-back line. It has been used once for real and the outcome noted.