Concept
Rudeness Contagion
Rudeness contagion is the tendency for incivility to spread from person to person, so that people who are treated rudely become more likely to treat others rudely, which is why Robert Sutton urges people dealing with a difficult person to protect themselves and refuse to pass it on.
Research on workplace incivility, including studies by Trevor Foulk and colleagues, suggests that rudeness behaves somewhat like a cold: people exposed to it become quicker to see hostility in others and more likely to respond rudely themselves. Sutton draws two lessons. The first is self-protection. Time spent around a demeaning person drains attention and patience, so the damage does not stay in the room where it happened; it follows you into how you treat your team, your clients and your family. Recovery helps: time with people who treat you well, sleep, a walk before the next meeting. The second lesson is responsibility. The person who has been belittled all morning is the one most at risk of belittling someone else in the afternoon, often someone with less power. Noticing that pull, and choosing not to act on it, is how a difficult person's influence stops with you instead of spreading through the team.
A real-life example
In Ankara, Emre, a shift lead at a call centre, spends the morning being shouted at by an angry client. At lunch he realises he has just snapped at a new hire over a small mistake. He apologises to her, goes outside for ten minutes, and asks a colleague to take the next escalated call. In the afternoon his team gets the calm version of him.
How to use it
- 1After a hard encounter, notice whether you are quicker to judge or snap at others.
- 2Build a short recovery step before your next interaction: a walk, a break, a talk with someone who treats you well.
- 3If you passed it on, apologise quickly to the person who received it.