Quote
“Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness.”
— Susan Jeffers, in Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway (1987) · Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway →
Why it was said
This is the last of Susan Jeffers's five truths about fear, the list at the centre of Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway. The first four say that fear will not go away as long as you keep growing, that the way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to do it, that doing it is also how you come to feel better about yourself, and that everyone feels fear on unfamiliar ground.
What it actually means
Jeffers compares two fears, not fear and comfort. Acting brings a sharp, short fear tied to a specific step. Not acting brings a dull, lasting fear: the sense that life is happening to you and that you could not cope if things went wrong. The second is easy to miss because it feels like safety. The truth asks you to weigh the two honestly, and most of the time the step you are avoiding costs less fear than the helplessness of avoiding it.
How to use it
- 1Write down one thing you are avoiding and two lists beside it: the fear of doing it, and the cost of staying where you are.
- 2Take the smallest version of the step this week, such as sending the email or making the call.
- 3After you act, note how long the fear actually lasted.