Concept
Intrinsic Goals
Intrinsic goals are goals pursued for their own sake, such as growing, deepening relationships or contributing to others, rather than for money, image or approval, and Lyubomirsky counts committing to them among the practices that raise wellbeing.
Committing to meaningful goals is one of the activities in The How of Happiness, and Lyubomirsky is specific about which goals help. She draws on research by Tim Kasser and Richard Ryan, which found that people who put wealth, fame or appearance at the centre of their aims tend to report lower wellbeing than those who pursue growth, connection and contribution, and on Ken Sheldon's work on authentic goals: the ones that express who you are rather than what you feel pressured to want. The goals that help share a few other features. They are approach goals, framed as moving towards something rather than escaping something; they fit with each other instead of pulling in opposite directions; and they can be adjusted when circumstances change. Part of the benefit comes from the pursuit itself. Working towards a goal gives the days structure, a sense of purpose and moments of progress, so the reward does not wait for the finish line. Jonathan Haidt describes the same pattern in The Happiness Hypothesis: much of the pleasure lies in making progress towards a goal rather than in reaching it.
A real-life example
Burak, a sales manager in Samsun, wrote his goals for the year: a regional title and a bigger car. Writing them down, he noticed they were goals for other people's eyes. He kept the job goal but added one he wanted for its own sake: learning to play the bağlama well enough to join his uncle's Thursday evenings of music. Six months on, the lessons are what he talks about.
How to use it
- 1Write your current goals and, next to each one, answer honestly: would you still want it if no one ever knew?
- 2Rephrase any avoidance goal as an approach goal: not "stop being unfit" but "swim twice a week".
- 3Choose one goal you want for its own sake and give it a fixed slot this week.
