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Concept

Ethical Influence

Ethical influence is using the levers of persuasion only when what they point at is true, arises naturally from the situation, and could be shown to the other person without shame. Cialdini's code of ethics comes down to three questions: is it true, is it natural, is it wise?

The seven levers of influence are neutral; the same social proof can be a fact displayed or a fiction staged, the same scarcity a real capacity or a countdown that resets on reload. What separates persuasion from manipulation is not knowledge of the levers, which anyone can acquire, but a test applied before each is pulled. Cialdini's code of ethics puts it in three questions. True: does the lever point at something real? Natural: did it arise from the situation, or was it manufactured for the conversation? Wise: does it serve everyone involved, including the relationship? A practical check of our own for the last one: would you be comfortable if the other person saw exactly what you did? Cialdini also argues, from research with colleagues on dishonesty inside organisations, that deceptive influence is expensive as well as wrong: performance falls, honest employees leave, and staff who were taught to cheat customers learn to cheat the company. The honest persuader works like a detective, finding the real reasons for a yes that are already present in the situation and using the levers to deliver them.

A real-life example

A software vendor in Ankara tells a hospital that 'most hospitals in the region' use its system. Two do. The claim closes the sale and is discovered within a year by a procurement officer who now discounts everything else the vendor says, including the true things. The next tender goes elsewhere, and the officer tells colleagues why.

How to use it

  1. 1Before any ask, run the three questions in writing: true, natural, wise. If one fails, drop the lever, not the ask.
  2. 2Show the real version of the lever: checkable proof, actual limits, expertise demonstrated rather than claimed.
  3. 3Keep a record of asks you refused to manipulate; it is the evidence that the code is real.